Yesterday Sky News was reporting an interview of Miriam González Durántez, aka Mrs Nick Clegg (Nick Clegg is the UK’s Deputy Prime Minister). Ms González Durántez was saying that she isn’t really looking to ‘have it all;’ she just wants to have the same as men do. I found myself wondering how, with such a high profile legal career, a high profile husband to support and three small sons, she manages to do it all. Of course, the Cleggs will be able to afford help in their house and childcare, but there must still be a lot to juggle. I wonder how she does it?
Then I thought, just look at yourself, H. People who know me personally will be familiar with the variety of life issues that I am constantly juggling:
I’m a single parent;
I have a professional career, albeit freelance and part time;
I look after two disabled family members, one with mental health issues and one with a physical disability;
I’m a prolific writer and blogger and nearing the publication of my first book;
I’m just launching my Mind Calm Meditation Coaching practice;
I have sidelines in copy editing and private tutoring;
I have my own energy-limiting health issues.
There is probably more but those are the aspects of my life that come to mind most readily.
That’s a lot. In fact, it is probably more than any 52 year-old woman should take on if she were being sensible. So, I asked myself, how do I do it?
In practical terms, one of my most valuable strategies is to embrace imperfection, to drop things that are inessential or less important, and to forget about keeping up appearances or keeping people happy just for the sake of it (people pleasing). So, as you will know if you’ve visited my house, I don’t spend time tidying but my dog gets brushed every day. I don’t iron my son’s clothes (he wouldn’t notice!) but I always make time to listen to him. My car is full of stuff but I create opportunities to take my mother out for drives. I sort my priorities rigorously and live according to them.
But on a deeper level, there is stuff that I do which keeps me well, thriving and happy despite the numerous pressures and the situations that could be described as problems (or even crises). That stuff is described in detail in my forthcoming book, Towards Tranquillity, which is all about my own journey away from chronic worry. It takes time to write, edit and publish a book, however, and I wanted to make my sanity-saving strategies available right away. So I created this 30 day course:
If you’d like to have more time, energy and peace as a result of letting go of worry, sign up for the course so I can share my strategies with you on a daily basis. You get an email every day for 30 days, audio recordings to download and keep, and membership of an exclusive Facebook group. All for the less than the cost of three lattes per week over the course of a month. I want to share these strategies with you because I know that so many women are making their busy lives even harder for themselves unnecessarily. Let me show you how to be less stressed and more peaceful while you juggle!
There’s more. Taking one aspect of the Towards Tranquillity approach a bit further, I have become a Mind Calm Meditation Coach. I trained with Sandy C.Newbigging because, when I discovered this simple method which anyone can learn to use as part of their daily life, I knew I couldn’t keep it to myself! On busy days, I really do make extra time to meditate. This practice helps me to be more productive, calmer and more grounded, and much, much more cheerful. I have become like Teflon: stress may occur, but it no longer sticks! Find out more here:
So if, like me, you’ve also wondered, when contemplating a woman in the public eye, ‘never mind having it all, how on earth do you do it all?’ why not investigate some strategies that will help you do just that. It’s no coincidence that many high profile women now take time to meditate, practise yoga, care for their own wellbeing and reorganise their priorities. This stuff works, and why should we settle for an ok, just-good-enough life when we can experience a wonderful life, whatever happens to be going on around us?
If you’d like to know more about Choosing Tranquillity or Mind Calm, contact me here or on social media. I look forward to hearing from you!
I can relate to doing lots of different things, and also to being messy!
I often wonder if I have too many interests, that it’s impossible to cater to all of them! That’s why I aim to direct myself towards writing, because that allows me to write about all my interests.
I agree that calmness is a key to so much juggling, plus I suppose over time people just work out the habits that allow them to do it!
Great points, Gordon, thanks!